12 Reasons Why You Should Never Date a Cop: Insights from Real People

Hi there, it’s Emily. Let me share my experience dating Alex, who’s a cop.

Dating a cop isn’t always easy.

Sometimes plans change last minute because of his job.

I remember one time we were supposed to go to a concert, but Alex got called into work.

I was disappointed, but I understood that his job is important.

Latest Update: Here is the updated guide on dating a cop in 2024!

How Hard It Can Be:

Dating Alex taught me to be patient.

His job can be stressful, and there are days when he comes home tired.

It can be tough not knowing if he’s safe when he’s on duty, but I’ve learned to trust that he knows what he’s doing.

Is It a Good Idea?:

Despite the challenges, there are things I love about dating a cop.

Alex is brave and dedicated, and I admire him for that.

If you’re someone who values those qualities, then dating a cop might be a good fit for you.

They appreciate partners who understand the demands of their job and support them through it all.

What to Know:

If you’re thinking about dating a cop, be prepared for changes and worries.

Their job is important, so it’s important to be understanding and patient.

But if you’re both willing to put in the effort, it can be a rewarding experience.

So, this was just my story being a wife…

Let me share with you some more insights which i came across in my life, well mind that they are all my perspective, might be just my observation.

So, let’s dive into them.

Reasons to Think Twice About Dating Cops:

1. Tough Times on the Beat:

Being a cop isn’t all lights and sirens.

My neighbor’s dad is a police officer, and he says it can be really tough.

He’s seen some scary things that stick with him, and it’s hard for him to shake them off when he comes home.

2. Plans Can Change Fast:

My cousin’s friend once dated a cop, and she said it was hard to make plans together.

Sometimes he’d get called in to work at the last minute, and they’d have to cancel their date night.

It’s tough when you can’t count on spending time together.

3. It’s a Risky Business:

My teacher told us about her brother, who’s a cop.

He’s had some close calls on the job, and it really scared his family.

Dating someone who puts themselves in danger like that every day would definitely make me nervous.

4. Rules Are Rules:

My friend’s mom dated a cop, and they’d always argue about rules.

He was always telling her what she should and shouldn’t do, and it made her feel like she was being watched all the time.

It’s hard to feel relaxed when you’re worried about breaking the rules.

5. Always Ready to Roll:

My aunt’s boyfriend is a cop, and he’s always on call.

Even when they’re out having fun, he has to be ready to go if something comes up at work.

It’s tough not knowing if your plans will get interrupted.

6. Emotions Run High:

My brother’s friend dated a cop, and she said it was emotionally exhausting.

She’d worry about him every time he went to work, and it was hard for her to relax.

It’s tough to be in a relationship when you’re always on edge.

People You Told Us: Why Never Date a Cop

1. The Badge Comes First

Every person I spoke with highlighted this as a major concern.

When you’re dating a cop, be prepared to take a backseat to their job.

Work will always come first, and that can lead to feelings of neglect or frustration in the relationship.

Opinion: Jenny, 28

“I dated a cop for two years, and it always felt like I was competing with his job. Whether it was canceling plans last minute or constantly being on call, I never felt like a priority. It took a toll on our relationship, and ultimately, we couldn’t make it work.”

2. High-Stress Environment

Being in law enforcement means dealing with high-pressure situations on a daily basis.

Stress levels can run sky-high, and unfortunately, that stress doesn’t magically disappear when they come home.

It can manifest in various ways, from mood swings to emotional distance.

Opinion: Mike, 35

“My ex-girlfriend was a cop, and I can tell you, the stress was palpable. It felt like walking on eggshells around her sometimes. Even on her days off, she was still mentally at work. It became exhausting trying to support her through it all.”

3. Trust Issues

Given the nature of their job, cops often deal with distrust and skepticism from the public. This can spill over into their personal lives, leading to trust issues in relationships.

It’s not uncommon for partners to feel paranoid or suspicious, especially if their significant other is secretive about their work.

Opinion: Sarah, 31

“I’ll be honest, dating a cop made me question everything. There were times when he’d come home late, and I couldn’t help but wonder if he was really at work or if something else was going on. It’s not a healthy mindset to be in, constantly doubting the person you’re with.”

4. Constant Danger

Last but certainly not least, let’s talk about danger. Police work is inherently risky, and that risk extends to their loved ones as well.

Whether it’s the fear of them getting hurt on the job or the constant worry every time they leave for work, dating a cop means living with a level of anxiety that can be hard to shake.

Opinion: Mark, 29

“I was dating a cop when he got injured on duty. Seeing someone you care about in that kind of danger is absolutely terrifying. It made me realize just how much I was putting on the line by being with him, and ultimately, I had to step back for my own peace of mind.”

5. Lack of Work-Life Balance

Law enforcement careers often demand irregular hours, overnight shifts, and unpredictable schedules.

This can wreak havoc on personal relationships, leaving partners feeling neglected or resentful.

Opinion: Emily, 33

“My husband is a cop, and I can’t remember the last time we had a normal dinner together. His schedule is all over the place, and it feels like we’re ships passing in the night most days. It takes a toll on our marriage, that’s for sure.”

6. Legal and Ethical Dilemmas

When you’re dating a cop, you might find yourself grappling with legal and ethical dilemmas that you never anticipated.

From witnessing questionable behavior on the job to navigating conflicts of interest in your personal life, being romantically involved with law enforcement can raise some thorny moral questions.

Opinion: Jason, 26

“I started dating a cop, and everything was great until I found out he was involved in some shady stuff at work. Suddenly, I was torn between loyalty to him and doing the right thing. It’s a position I never thought I’d be in, and it’s not easy to navigate.”

7. Social Isolation

Another aspect that often gets overlooked is the social isolation that can come with dating a cop.

Whether it’s due to their unconventional schedule or the nature of their job, law enforcement partners may find themselves feeling disconnected from their friends and community.

Opinion: Laura, 30

“My girlfriend is a cop, and I can’t tell you how many social events we’ve had to miss because of her schedule. It’s like we’re living in a different world sometimes. Our friends just don’t understand the demands of her job, and it’s hard to relate to them anymore.”

8. Emotional Toll

Whether it’s dealing with the constant worry for their safety or the strain of being their emotional support through traumatic experiences, it can be emotionally draining for both parties involved.

Opinion: Chris, 29

“My boyfriend is a cop, and I can’t shake this feeling of dread every time he leaves for work. I know it’s irrational, but I can’t help imagining the worst-case scenarios. It’s like living with a constant sense of anxiety, and it’s taking a toll on my mental health.”

9. Power Dynamics

The authority they wield in their professional lives can sometimes spill over into their personal relationships, leading to imbalances that can be difficult to navigate.

Opinion: Ashley, 27

“I dated a cop briefly, and it felt like he was always in control. Whether it was making decisions about our plans or shutting down conversations that made him uncomfortable, I couldn’t shake the feeling of being powerless in the relationship.”

10. Lack of Privacy

Privacy can be a luxury in law enforcement relationships. Between the scrutiny of their colleagues and the public’s perception, cops often find themselves living in a fishbowl.

This lack of privacy can put a strain on personal relationships, leaving partners feeling exposed and vulnerable.

Opinion: Ryan, 32

“My wife is a cop, and it feels like everyone’s always watching us. Whether it’s nosy coworkers asking about our personal lives or strangers recognizing her in public, there’s no escaping the spotlight. It’s like we can never truly have a private moment together.”

11. Emotional Distance

The emotional toll of police work can sometimes lead to emotional distance in relationships.

Whether it’s coping mechanisms developed on the job or the need to compartmentalize traumatic experiences, cops may struggle to fully open up to their partners, leaving them feeling disconnected and alone.

Opinion: Megan, 29

“My partner is a cop, and it’s like pulling teeth trying to get him to open up about his day. He’s always so closed off, and it makes me feel like I’m on the outside looking in. It’s hard to build intimacy when there’s this emotional wall between us.”

12. Constant Vigilance

Whether it’s worrying about their safety on the job or being hyper-aware of their surroundings in public, the need to be constantly vigilant can take a toll on both partners, leading to heightened anxiety and stress.

Opinion: Jamie, 34

“My husband is a cop, and I can’t remember the last time I slept through the night without waking up in a panic. The constant worry about his safety is always lurking in the back of my mind, and it’s exhausting. It feels like we’re always on edge, waiting for the other shoe to drop.”

More Entries: About dating a cop

1. Sarah’s Adventure: “Hi, I’m Sarah. I used to date a guy named Tom who was a cop. Tom’s job was pretty demanding. Whenever we made plans to hang out, sometimes he’d get called to work at the last minute. It was frustrating, but seeing him in his uniform, all brave and ready to help people, made me feel proud.”

2. Jake’s Dad: “Hey, it’s Jake. My dad’s a cop, and let me tell you, his job is super busy. One time, he promised to take me to the amusement park for my birthday. But guess what? He got called in for work that day. I was bummed, but my dad made it up to me later. We had a blast at the park, and it made me realize that family time is important.”

3. Emily’s Concern: “Hey, I’m Emily. My sister used to date a cop, and she’d worry herself sick whenever he was on duty. Sometimes, he’d be late coming home, and she’d start to panic. It was tough seeing her so worried all the time.”

4. David’s Neighbor: “Hi, I’m David. I live next door to a cop, and let me tell you, his job can be really tough. Sometimes, he comes home looking tired and sad. But having a supportive partner makes it easier for him to deal with the stress.”

5. Mia’s Insight: “Hey, Mia here. My friend dated a cop, and they argued a lot about rules. Her boyfriend was really strict, even in their relationship. It caused a lot of tension between them.”

6. Tyler’s Experience: “Hi, it’s Tyler. I knew someone who dated a cop, and their plans would often get interrupted by work. It was frustrating, but they learned to deal with it. They realized that sometimes, duty comes first.”